My mom gave up her battle with cancer Wednesday May 27th and went home to God. A part of me is overjoyed that her pain and suffering is over and she’s in heaven now with my Dad, but in one space of a second I not only lost my Mom but I lost my best friend.

Yesterday at the visitation people kept coming up to me and saying it doesn’t seem possible, she was such a tough lady, I never thought she would go. My sister-in-law told me that on Tuesday when I was out of the room, she had told Ilene that she was tired and just wanted to go home and did Ilene think I would mind if she just gave up and went. Ilene told her I would understand and deep down I do and I’m really glad she didn’t ask me, cause I’m not sure I would have been strong enough to tell her to go.

At the funeral home everyone kept standing around and looking at her and I could see her in mind raising up and telling everyone to quit staring that she was trying rest. Someone told me that they had never really met my mom and I told them that they had really missed out and it was so true.

I used to see and hear about what other mothers were doing and how they were choosing to raise their children and every time I would go to mom and I would hug her and thank her for being my mom. I would see a commercial on tv for some fancy new baby thing that a mother just can’t live without and I would tease my mom that I was lucky I lived since she never had any of that fancy stuff.

She will be forever missed and never forgotten. I know she is now watching over me as she has always watched over me.

I love you Mom.

Sorry for the lack of posts. I brought my mom home. She now has a huge infected bedsore that encompasses most of her backside. She didn’t eat right while in the hospital, can’t say I blame her since a starving dog wouldn’t eat what they serve. I just flat out told the doctor I’m taking her home. Of course we had to go into hospice since I couldn’t take care of her completely by myself. I’ve checked right and left and hospice is the only option in this whole area that takes medicare/medicaid and provides the services that hospice does. It’s really sad that you have to give up and die to get help.
I also received more bad news. My cousin Charlene who stuck by me the whole time mom was in the hospital and who said she would pack a bag and come stay with me to help out, is in the hospital herself now. She’s been having bad headaches for a month and the medical doctor said it was sinus. Well a ct scan Sunday showed 3 small spots of cancer. She called the cancer doctor and he put her in the hospital. She actually has lung cancer that spread to her brain.

I’m telling you right here, right now. We had better step up and do something before it’s too late for everybody. I’ve been doing research on cancer and I’ve talked to different people, and the consensus is it’s the preservatives in our food and the crap they spray on the crops these days that is killing us. It’s going to get to the point where cancer is as common as a damn cold, too bad you can’t lay in bed for a week and get over cancer.